It seems we need another reminder on what never to say (or act) when running for political office. I say this because apparently the candidates never seem to learn.
First, try not to use the “Nazi” card . . . as in “Those other guys are acting like a Nazis by not voting on this measure I really like.” Just rubs people the wrong way unless you're trying to find a real bad guy for a book or movie.
Second, avoid the “God called on me to run” card. If God called on you, I’m doubting it was to throw your hat into a ring filled with political fools, which now includes you. I’m not sure, but God probably won’t set the bar that low.
Third, if you’re accused of some wrongdoing in your past, don’t act surprised if it comes up now. That’s not a media conspiracy, that the media’s job. Address the issue assertively and clearly and honestly when the story breaks. Don’t keep altering and clarifying it over the next couple of weeks. Then lay off personally attacking whatever or whomever it is accusing you of whatever and tell your lawyer not to threaten anyone (re: Herman Cain’s attorney Lin Wood). Failure to accept this will result in a story growing legs and developing over weeks, kill your campaign (no matter how much you bitch at the press), and in the end won’t stop whatever truth there is from coming out. People will forgive and forget, but not if you fumble, mumble and lie at the outset.
Fourth, don’t wear a coat and tie when campaigning in a country diner. If you dress differently than those around you, you’re the “don’t get it” politician. Fit in you dope. Nobody wears a coat and tie to a diner unless they’re on their way to an office job. Lose the fancy duds, break out an old golf shirt (not a new Izod) and have at those eggs and country-fried steak with homemade biscuits. In the long run you’ll feel much better about yourself and those photos of you fitting in with the locals will live forever.
Fifth, try not to be stupid. We voters aren’t, in the long run, stupid. We may act that way in the beginning, but we’ll eventually figure you out. Try to come up with some useful ideas instead of just pissing on the other guy. And if you’re running attack ads instead of giving us a good idea of where you stand on issues important to us (start with the economy, jobs, Medicare, the deficit people like you created, healthcare and child welfare . . . feel free to add yours). Why should I vote for you, not just why shouldn’t I vote for the other schmuck? I figure you’re not going to keep your pledges when you’re elected, but at least give me something to chew on before I get into the voting booth.
(Note: Don’t worry, I have tons of other tips for these guys. After all, with a year to go, do you really think they have a clue about how to act or not to act?)
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