Suicide . . . We need to better understand and commit more resources to mental health

You ever think about killing yourself?

Some of us have, and yet we are still here, which got me to wondering why reasonably “normal” people kill themselves. I understand mental disorders are often a major influence, and I am certainly no expert on any of this, but it always has mystified me, in a way, how people can think things are so bleak that they decide to end their lives.

We read every day about people shooting other people . . . but there’s really a suicide epidemic in the U.S., where some 43,000 people kill themselves every year. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the U.S, with a suicide reported every 12 minutes. Over the past 10 years (to 2014), the rate of suicide has increased to 12.9 per 100,000 people in the U.S. (CDC)

In researching and talking to people about suicide, it seems clear that sometimes people just can’t see a way out of their trouble, or they feel their lives are over after a breakup and can’t see a future without their former love, or they’re bullied and shamed and can no longer take the abuse. Social media has brought issues of shaming and bullying into the homes and schools of millions of kids across the country . . . a relentless 24-hour stream of online hate and vitriol. (Reading about a young women who killed herself also prompted me to write this.) Seniors, especially white men, are far more likely to commit suicide than any other group . . . White men 85 and older have a suicide rate that is six times that of the overall national rate.

Interestingly, more than four times as many men (on average) as women die by suicide; but women attempt suicide more often during their lives than do men, and women report higher rates of depression. Suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death in people age 15 to 24. (CDC)

In talking with suicide hotline people, a rise in drug use has added to the issues that make people feel trapped and unable to escape their situation. In talking to friends and family, that feeling of being “trapped” was seen as a major reason the people they knew killed themselves . . . Many of us have friends or family who killed themselves. That feeling of being trapped came up again and again in conversations.

For me, my first passing thought came when I was in the midst of a divorce, and believed that my failure in what was supposed to be the most important thing in my life was a complete personal disaster and the end of a life I/we had planned. That overwhelmed me. It would have been so easy to simply drive into a bridge abutment. For some people, those feelings never go away, they just can’t see past now . . .

I know I’m oversimplifying it all, (and not deeply addressing the many causes of suicide), but sometimes we just can’t see what’s going on with other people . . . A kid feeling trapped at home by his parents . . . or a young girl struggling with her self-image and being bullied because she’s a bit “different” from some other kids . . .The texts and postings never stop, whether she’s at home or out or in school, relentlessly driving her to the point where she feels there’s no escape . . . An older person depressed that their health is failing . . . A young girl struggling with an eating disorder wrestles with her body image, slips into depression and kills herself. While the light has better illuminated disorders like bulimia, now better addressing the underlying issues than a decade ago, we need to continue to look for the root causes of disorders like bulimia.

Some people with attention deficit disorders kill themselves in what experts call "impulsive" suicides . . . an apparent spur of the moment decision, adding to the difficulties in prevention.

I find myself troubled when I don’t have a neat conclusion as to why someone takes his or her own life . . . Why did a former co-worker of mine step off a train platform in front of a speeding train? Or why did a relative I remember as a great little kid take his Dad’s gun, go into the bathroom and blow his brains out when he was a teenager?

We’ve come a long way towards better understand some issues, depression among them, and yet we are still shocked when this happens simply because we didn’t see our friends or family members as being depressed. Years ago nobody talked about the burden many vets face when they return home. Now we better understand post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and have started to make sure we are counseling and intervening with vets and others to help them see a way back to a more normal life.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kristina-kaufmann/collateral-damage_b_8701522.html

It’s estimated that 30 to 35 percent of the 2.7 million soldiers who have served since 9/11 (2001) are dealing with some form of stress disorder, brain injury or drug abuse and the impact on not only them, but their families is devastating. Some experts think it's higher than that. (HuffPost)

What we do know is we don’t know enough . . . We need to pay attention, be there always for our children and friends. I know that people who kill themselves often don’t understand that they are surrounded by people who love them and would do anything to stop their plunge into suicide if only they had the chance.

Our world is filled with people who struggle . . . Soldiers, kids, the elderly, your neighbor . . . We need to make sure they know we are there if they need us. Sit and listen carefully. Some of us may have gotten depressed or down, but were able to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Others just can’t. Little signs can be cause for concern and we need to better understand those. 

We need to dedicate more resources, locally and nationally, private and governmental, to helping those people and showing them that they are living a life well worth living.